A lullaby

Sleep my little one,
That noise was just a gun,
Sleep my little one,
The war has just begun.

A house in shambles we rest,
Your cradle against the wall,
'tween the fumes and the stench of blood,
Dream of life through it all.

A few more years I pray you live,
Long enough to walk and run,
A few more times, nights you slumber,
And wake in the morn to leap for the sun.

And if your lungs still want to breathe,
At the cusp of life as a man,
I hope you find your first true love,
And stand upright as you watch her leave.

I see you, your back arched straining,
Muscles tense, as you try to hold back the wind,
Resolute against the unstoppable gale,
On your knees, I see your energy draining.

I pray that you are as strong,
To fight the losing battles of love and life,
To stand tall against the wrong,
Albeit succumbing to the strife

There I see your eyelids droop,
With the burden of the years to come,
There I see the rhythmic rise and fall,
Deep sleep my son, the spoils of war

Hold high your head your flag,
Hold close your heart your faith,
Hold tight the truth, tis a last hope,
For Justice here is a slippery slope

And know I always watch over thee,
And so doth your mother from heaven,
In life, in Death, on land and sea
You are never too far away from me.

So sleep my little one,
For here is a man who points a gun,
Sleep my little one,
Your life has just begun...

An insecurity called love

I am but a broken record,
The same tune I forever play,
Uniformly random are my thoughts,
I can find no difference from yesterday

You came into this joke I call my life,
You tried to make the darkness go away,
Your eyes tried to hold my attention,
Your hands forever tried to still my sway

You gave me peace of mind,
And now I made you take it away,
You gave me so much of you that,
now I am forever afraid you'll leave me behind

I know there is no reason to fear,
I know that you are my fate,
But every moment apart from you,
Insecurity compels and I am hate

I am but a man on a raft,
Sailing through the endless blue,
Haggard and parched and a worried face,
I know not what to do...

Alone I float lost in my own smoke,
Not a soul to whom I can relate,
All I hear is the damned ocean,
And the emptiness of my soul,

Years go by in a haze,
And one bright sunny morning,
I see a bird in the sky,
Her wings are bathed in golden light,
She is the kind of beauty which evokes a sigh

She lands on my raft and looks me in the eye,
She coo'es in my ear and gives me a peck,
The lines on my face part into a smile,
I have finally found my bearing in life.

My little miracle stays with me till dusk,
She then decides she must leave,
She promises that come dawn,
She will fly straight back to me

The thought of her flying away makes me sad,
But I trust her more than myself,
And I kiss her goodbye,
All the time wiping the tears in my eye

This chain of events repeats everyday,
From morn to night she makes me feel young again,
But every time she leaves,
I watch helplessly and grieve

Then one day the germ of doubt,
Starts slowly growing in my mind,
She may not come back in the morrow,
She may find someone more interesting than me

I start to suspect when she is away,
I start to quarrel every day,
I protest and I rebel,
In the hope that she might choose to stay

I love her enough to become as bad as hate,
Holding her tight may bruise my love,
I now see a choice between her hurt and my fear,
I know I must choose to remain afraid,
And now life goes on as before,
She breathes into me fresh life everyday,
We smile, we dance, we leap, we soar,
We lay on our backs close beside,
And as the sun goes down she readies to leave,
I smile and I wave as I die inside...

The devil in paradise

Eyes close as my body goes limp,
My lungs take in their last gulp of air,
The dark tunnel appears around me,
I shrug my shoulders and walk into the light...

I know where I am headed,
Flashes of fire and screams of pain,
The agony of torture, retribution for my sins,
The crushing of bones, the boiling rain...

But t'was not to be my place,
Instead I was taken to the pearly gates,
Angels and harps and golden strands of sun,
I could not believe that I was forgiven...

Walked in with a sly smile on my face,
I hoodwinked Him, Him who knows all,
From the jaws of hell, I had turned my fate,
A sinner like me, from heaven a call...

I looked at Him, my lips a sneer,
Fooled you old man, my conscience a'int clear,
He looked at me with a knowing smile,
Uncertain for the first time, I averted my gaze...

Heaven was as heaven should,
The land of dreams, the land of good,
The garden green, the sturdy house,
The sober sailor, the faithful spouse

The honest man, the loyal friend,
Flowers in eternal bloom, everlasting rainbows,
The day without night, The high without a low,
The soul without envy, patience which has no end...

I wandered among the sacrificing and the great,
The virtuous politician, the pious priest,
Love without afflictions, one without hate,
I felt so out of place...

Soon I start to jump the lines,
With the angel I start to flirt,
She slaps me not, she flings no dirt,
Always patient,Always perfect,
Miserable in this place so divine...

At last I know, at last I see,
Heaven is no place for a mortal like me,
Set in my habits, I err in my ways,
I see the path, but the human in me strays...

Retribution is not always what you assume,
Penance for your sins may be life with the good,
Not the screams of the insane, not the blood and fumes,
But in virtue which all else consumes,
Man will suffer, no matter how strong,
In a place where, try as he might,
He can do no wrong...

Silent waters...

A glimpse and she is gone,
Shadows of light in a toss of her head,
At once I am reborn,
For the first time, my soul t'is stirred,
Symphony, ecstasy, a storm is ahead.

A storm of passion, of exquisite pain,
Violent gales, I fall to my knees,
Her hands so delicate, fingers like gentle rain,
Pleasure wracks my being as I burn in her embrace.

An animal, I roar, down at her I stare,
Lightning strikes and her eyes are aflame,
A soft smile, a whisper to tame,
An infant, I howl begging for care.

I work up the nerve, ask her to dance,
I dread acceptance, I dread being turned down,
Her and a mortal like me, the Gods will frown,
On high cliffs, against angry waves,
We sway to the sound.

And now ye are warned, my friend,
Angels can sin and pigs can fly,
A circle can transform into a line,
Words can cease to rhyme,
But this dance is forever mine ...

I watch you try, I see you flirt,
I hear you sing and admire the skirt,
She loves me she loves me not,
A boy, a million miles away,
You think you have a shot.

She seems to talk, with you she likes to walk,
She laughs at your grin, wipes crumbs of your chin,
Sad when you leave, she almost cries,
You think you have something I have not,
And you think you have a shot.

My dear friend, I read your brave story,
Believe me I admire your attempt at glory,
But understand this boy,
Not every will has a way,
Not every black cloud has a silver line,
For you and the million others who try every day,
Remember, this dance is mine...this dance is mine.

Conjoined Twins

This man I know, this man I see,
He stands upright, his stride is sure,
He does no wrong, lives life honestly,
With eyes so clear and a heart so pure,
This man I know, this man I see...

I watch him smile, I see him cry,
I see him working hard to shape,
These lumps of clay, fragments of his heart,
For these are more than mere friends,
They are his kin for life...

Close to his body, them he holds,
He thinks they hold him as tight,
Warmth he wants and warmth he gives,
Till day emerges from night...

This man I know, This man I see,
Casual he leans against the gates of hell,
Sparks shoot from the embers he holds,
With bloodshot eyes and a soul to sell,
He watches as his dark night unfolds...

I watch him slide as silent as sin,
Sly his back as it moves across the wall,
Cautious he approaches the battle to begin,
Wary is he of the back stabbing dolls....

Close to all but near to none,
A radiant smile across his face,
He holds hands, but trusts no one,
All the time, the cold emanating in his gaze...

They turn around and look me in the eye,
They want to know where my loyalties lie,
They wink at me, both satan and the seer,
And as the sky meets the sea,
The image merges with the mirror,
The men I see become........me.

Reflections of my mind...

I look in the mirror,
I know not what I see,
No matter how hard I try,
I cannot see inside of me...

Everywhere there is darkness,
At last I see a glint of light,
The shine I saw were shards of glass,
Shards of glass that were a mirror...

Now there is nothing left to see,
There are doors, but I have no key...

I try and try to come to the surface,
But the current keeps pulling me down,
I find that no matter what I do,
I have sentenced my soul to drown...

Flashes erupt as life passes me by,
Filled with highs and never ending lows,
This is one applause filled drama,
For which I dont want to bow....

I am running now,
faster and faster,
The earth slipping under me,
No matter how hard I run,
I cant find what is inside of me...

What happened to me I know not,
Who has this storm brought,
I look around and I see,
it is you standing near me...

Together we run,
faster and faster,
Trying to beat the pace,
Together we try, so hard we try,
To win this never ending race...

I want to find myself and so do you,
Alas we didn't know,
we find ourselves in each other...

So there is no need to run,
No need to hide,
No need to swim,
Or pierce the tide,
All we need is each other,
Cause I tell you there is one other
Reflection to my soul,
And that my love is you,
You are my ultimate goal...

What goes around must come around,
So I seem to be your goal too,
Let me see your heart baby,
Mine belongs to you...

Hallucination

Have you felt with your mind ,
Have you thought with your skin ,
Does her cruelty seem kind ,
Is there ecstasy in sin.

Why is everything upside down,
Why is my world turned around,
Why am I happy when I am sad,
Am I crazy or just a little mad.

It suddenly hits me, I know what has happened ,
I can’t believe it baby, but I know its true,
I’m overdosed darling, I had an overdose of you.

Love can make darkness glitter,
It can make the dull to shine,
Even make a saint a sinner
Love can make the devil divine.
It can make fools into poets,
And poets into fools,
I cant figure out which of the above I am,
Well I’m in love…… so I don’t give a damn.

Would you believe me if I say I can hear you smile,
That I can see your voice, I can feel your glance,
I can breath your love, I can taste your skin
Eyes closed, I can see you dance.
Miles away , but I feel you within.

You are silent ,but I hear you speak
There are people all around, but we are alone
We stand apart ,locked in an embrace,
My thoughts are lucid, my mind is in a daze.

My eyes seek you, my hand reaches for you
I think I am suddenly drowning
That I’m lost and don’t have a clue
And all my heart is yearning,
For just a feel of you.

You reach out and hold my hand,
Your eyes seem to fully understand,
Your touch is to assure me and to swear,
Tis to say that I will always be there
I hold you and I’m at peace,
I forget all my doubts and my fear.

Cause in my arms, I now have
All that I want, all that I need,
And all that I hold dear.
You my love are my highest high ,
You are my only real addiction,
You are the oasis in my desert so dry,
Girl you are my eternal hallucination.